Ugly Food That Tastes Good: The 12 Biggest Offenders

(Headline in Huffington Post)

1. A potato that looks like my Uncle Ralph. Isn’t it funny how one potato can look like Jesus Christ, but I get stuck with this thing?

2. Any carrot that resembles a penis.

3. Peas that have shriveled just a little, so their skin is wrinkled. It turns them into some kind of metaphor.

4. Fish with the head still on. It might be different if they had eyelids.

5. Whole head of a pig. Who serves these things? Just kings and such at the banquet table? I don’t recall seeing any down in the supermarket meat department.

6. Roadkill that hasn’t been spruced up a little.

7. Anything, like those fish I mentioned, that can look at you.

8. Anything still alive, especially if it tries to walk off.

9. Fried insects. There aren’t many insects that you could call “beautiful.”

10. Green meat.

11. Lardy or lardish desserts, or desserts made by those who are lardy or lardish.

12. “Long pig.”