Off Again

To Bura Turu. Thanks again, Danny, for minding the blog.

My favorite part of the island is now underwater.¬† ūüė¶

Everyone who can afford it has emigrated, many to Peurto Rico, where property prices are through the floor. Bargain hunters descend.

Only the poor remain on Bura. My special friend¬†Gaugakao is gone, but I’ll catch him up in Paris.

The reefs are all bleached out. No fish. A Green group is experimenting with a new, resistant coral. A project for decades, if not centuries.

I’ll pick up all the remaining native art on the island. Exploitative, but money is money. The silver lining of disaster.

I’m Back.

Just returned from Nameria on the Dark Continent. Thanks, Danny, for minding my blog.

My trip went smoothly. There was a coup but that isn’t unusual in Nameria. The businessman is treated with respect by both sides. Money is money.

The hotel has a new chef, a German woman. She works in Schnitzel vom Schwein. Wild pig is plentiful in Nameria.

I looked up Adebowale. He is in fine fettle. The Namerians are wonderfully modern where homosexuality is concerned. Once my business was concluded in the capitol, we paddled a dugout up the Okatawanga to his (all male!) village. The dugout and his village required much more of my energy than my transactions with the government did. Whew.

The country is warmer than before. The Bolanga plateau has become a desert. Who know whence the animals fled, if they have survived at all.

Favored bloggers, you’ll be receiving my postcards with their rare Namerian stamps afixed to them. Be patient, for they must come out of the country by elephant, just as I did.

My Most Humble Thanks

I have spent fifty years building and managing some of the finest hotels in the world. My top priority has never been to profit, only to provide the best possible guest experience to my patrons.

When I decided to move on to other career opportunities, I found it difficult to deal with the sadness associated with the severance of ties with the friends that I’ve made. Therefore, imagine my surprise when so many of you, my valued customers have chosen to follow me!

For-profit prisons occupy a prominent space in the economic high-growth sector. Their challenges are manifold, something to occupy me in my twilight years. Let us pray that my experience and continued energy provide me with the tools I’ll need to meet these challenges.

My most special thanks and kind wishes are reserved for those of you who have committed heinous and unforgivable crimes, which you have not even especially wanted to commit, only for the purpose of drawing multiple life sentences to be with me! We shall meet again! Gruel and bread crusts for everyone!

China’s Belt and Road initiative

China is building roads, railroads, pipelines, and ports around the world. Cost in the trillions. All in aid of increasing Chinese trade.

I’m inspired. Why not me?

I’ve formed the Irving Jones Infrastructure Company, where the “fra” is the Sun and Shade Senior Citizens Community in Blueweed, Kentucky.

I’m donating all my construction work to the community, while personally reaping the benefits therefrom.

Thanks to Qin Shi Huang, my next-door neighbor, for the suggestion.

Completed projects:

  • Delivery paths – These allow a golfcart (mine) to bring food from Sav-Mor to the backdoor of every resident. Obtaining eminent domain and right-to-pass permits from community management for every home in the development has caused some resentment, especially with the cutting of gaps in every back fence, but when I pull up to Oscar Wallace’s back door with his booze, discreetly, for example, fences will be mended (figuratively speaking).
  • Gopher pipelines – The gopher goes into the hole and can’t back out. Must follow the pipeline off the property, down the street, and into the swamp. The pipeline still allows snakes to go the other way, but a solution for this is in the works. Meanwhile, nurses at the clinic are standing by with a battery of anti-venoms.
  • Drone landing pads – In case others get interested in my drone hobby, I’ve built convenient pads in all the Sun and Shade “pocket parks” and parking lots. These are not just for my own personal use! Now that the peeping lawsuits have been settled, I expect others to take the drone plunge.
  • Shortcuts – I’ve taken the liberty of removing bits of hedge, rosebush branches, the occasional low-hanging limb, so forth, around the neighborhood, to make it easier for old folks to get from here to there. Makes a trip to McDonald’s from my house a lot easier!