haiku

humans circling earth
look down on the whole of it
their home suspended

for Imaginary Garden with Real Toads

Fibbing Friday

1. Why was Eric the Red called Eric the Red?
   eric was red
2. Why did Christopher Columbus sail west?
   east, north, and south hadn’t been invented yet
3. Who were the Vikings?
   scandinavians who viked.
4. What is a scullery maid?
   a maid up to scullduggery
5. What is a dumb waiter?
   huh?
6. How did British sailors earn the moniker, Limeys?
   you’re asking how did British sailors earn a moniker, Buddy?
7. How did U.S. troops earn the moniker, Yanks?
   you’re asking how did u.s. troops earn one of these monikers, too, ‘nother Buddy?
8. What is borscht?
   sorry, this is a family page
9. Who were the Bolsheviks?
   ballet dancers
10. What was the original purpose of the Great Wall of China?
    to keep the pet dogs from roaming?

for Fibbing Friday

oh!

oh! she said.
oho! he said.
ooh! she said.
…ohs…ohing…
uh oh! he said.
oh no! she said.
doh! he said.
pooh! she said.
oh well, he said.

for Stream of Consciousness Saturday

haiku

she owns my heart but
doesn’t yet know it; i’d own hers
but she hasn’t got one

for Thursday Inspiration

haiku

ruler with ruler
defines wilderness area
need better ruler

for Fandango’s One Word Challenge

haiku

broken promises
then broken environment
then broken future

for Ragtag Daily Prompt

poem

brisk day
brisk walk
brisket for dinner

for Your Daily Word Prompt

haiku

those not jittery
around humans in the wild
are not doing well

for Word of the Day Challenge

shopping

i’m surrounded by affluent neighborhoods. i used to do my shopping there. you know, at garage sales.

now, however, everybody is so well off they don’t bother with garage sales anymore. or estate or lawn or whatever sales.

they just stick the stuff out by the curb with a free sign on it.

free furniture, appliances, clothing, books and other media, games and toys, glassware,… you name it.

i only shop on weekdays. i call it shopping although there is never any haggling over price. it’s free! weekends are for the grocery store and pharmacy, where you actually have to pay money.

on the street, you’ve got to be ready to load whatever into your car or trundle it away on a handcart or just pick it up and carry if off. that’s the deal. first come, first served, but if you can’t handle it, you’ve got to give it up to the next in line. it’s the new ethos.

once you get to know the other shoppers, you can keep you eye out for items they need. barter happens. you learn their clothing sizes. the whole thing gets more efficient.

another aid to efficiency is the recent profusion of neighborhood web sites, where you can browse the posts before going shopping, to see what’s available out there.

a certain amount of the merchandise is to be found in its original amazon shipping container.

for Tale Weaver

open season

we opened season on nature a long time ago. now nature has declared open season on us.

we are a stubborn breed. intransigent.

sure, we’ve got some lily-livered cowards who want to give up at the first hurricane. turn tail. surrender. capitulate. wave the white flag. show the white feather.

not me though.

i get up at the crack of smoggy dawn, keep the air conditioner roaring, step out into the back yard, feed the bloodhounds, and check that my little ole oil well is still pumping crude.

i eat a steak for breakfast, hop in my pickup, and head out into the woods to hunt down the last of the endangered animals living there.

the shores of the country are going under water but i don’t live near the shores. tornadoes are multiplying but I don’t live in tornado country. we do get some earthquakes but that’s just from the fracking.

you’ve got to be adaptable when you’re up against mother nature. move to a place where she can’t get at you. move to a place where she has to feed you with wildlife, at least till you eat it all. you can’t fool around with somebody who can whip up a tidal wave or volcano at any minute.

i have been asked about compromise. meeting nature half way. about balance. a middle course. a happy medium.

that is not the human way. nature is not a member of our tribe. i have five wives. you think i’m going to compromise about that? i’d settle for three or four more, yeah, but that’s about it.

think of the future, they say. think of your children (and i’ve got plenty!). that’s their first mistake right there. when i got up this morning, i was thinking about the steak i was about to eat. that was my future.

for Thimbleful Thursday