(“My Top Three Excuses” contest. 150-word limit.)
1. Dear Janie. Thank you for your invitation. I’ve thought about it and, although I like you, I’ve decided not to come. Your parties usually aren’t that much fun.
2. Dear Janie. Thank you again for your invitation. I thought at first that I would come, out of respect for our friendship, but then I decided that it just wasn’t worth it, because your party will probably be something of a drag.
3. Dear Janie. Thank you for your invitation. My parents, my husband, and my children all believe that I’m going crazy. They say that this honesty business isn’t normal. Perhaps they’re right. I haven’t been myself lately. In any event, I won’t be coming, because I fear that your party will be a real snoozer.