My boyfriend told me he was breaking up with me. He told me that I lacked depth.

What about you? I said. You stock shelves at Safeway. What kind of depth is that?

It’s not about me, he said. I don’t care if I’ve got depth or not. You don’t care if I do either. But I care if you have depth, babe, and you don’t.

What if I really do? I asked him. How can I prove it if I do?

I don’t know, he said. I think I would just know it somehow, but when you talk you don’t know so much.

I smiled a little.  I’m a wily girl.

What? he said.

I shook my head, just gave it a little… shake, you know. I looked off over his shoulder. His shoulders are one of my favorite things about him.

He started to say something, shrugged, shuffled his feet.

I guess I’ll get back to the store, he said. I’m shelving canned peas and beans this afternoon.

I nodded.

What are you going to do? he asked.

I’ll be down at the library, I said. I often go there afternoons.

The library? he said. What the heck do you do in the library?

Read things. Study. Mostly gee… geogro… geography.

Gee…what? he said.

Oceans and lakes, I said. Do you know how deep the ocean is?

Which one?

Any of them, I said. I know how deep they all are.

Wait. I… I’ve got to get back to the store, but look, what I said?… Maybe we need to get to know each other a little better, honey. Why don’t I take you out to dinner tonight? After you get through at the library.


Posted for Pic and a Word

entangled time

“You’re back early.”

“How about a Welcome home, Darling?”

“Sorry. Welcome home, Darling.”‘

“You’re in the kitchen. That’s rare. Miss my cooking?”

“I can cook.”

“Really? How long have we been married? I don’t remember you ever cooking. Or coming into the kitchen. So you’ve been eating what while I was gone?”

“This and that. How did your lecture go? What was it about, again?”

“It went fine. Time entanglement.”

“Time entanglement. Something about physics, right?”

“I’ll give you an example. Suppose you got entangled with another person.”

“What? Why would you say that?”

“Take it easy. Let’s imagine that your wife goes away for a couple of days to give a lecture and you’re left here alone to starve.”

“Don’t be silly. Sure, you teach all day and then come home and make dinner, but I can cook.”

“So I peek under the sink in the wastebasket and… there aren’t any cans or TV dinner boxes. See?”

“I didn’t eat from cans, or any frozen stuff.”

“You cooked from scratch.”

“What does that mean?”

“You used the flour and sugar in the cabinet… Which cabinet is that, by the way?”

“Look… I… I found everything I needed, ok?”

“Uh huh. So I open the dishwasher… and look. It’s got dishes in it.”

“Sure. Because I was cooking and eating.”

“Uh huh. So being a mathematician, I count up the dishes and there seem to be twice as many as necessary.”

“I ate more often than usual.”

“So the entanglement thing, once somebody cooks for you and the food goes into your stomach and into her stomach and then some time goes by, the sheets come into play.”

“The sheets?”

“Yeah. You get entangled in them.”

Gruen Transfer

(Thanks to

The Gruen transfer happens when consumers enter a shopping mall or casino or IKEA store, or even a house, and surrounded by an intentionally confusing layout, lose track of their original intentions.

“Well, Sherry. This is it. My little bungalow. Thanks for coming over.”

“You’re welcome, Mr. Gruen. Or should I call you Victor?”

“My friends call me Vicki. Can I get you a drink?”

“A drink? What time is it?… Wait… Is this your bedroom?”

“Sit, Sherry. Relax.”

“Is this your bed? Did we come in the front door? Where did that martini come from?”

“It’s an apple martini. That’s why it’s green.”

“This spread still has a price tag on it.”

“Do you like the spread? Did you bring a major credit card with you?”

“The martini does taste good…”

“Just lay back…”

“Do you mean, just lie back?”

“I avoid that word. You’ve spilled some of your drink, staining the spread.”

“I’m so sorry!”

“We’ll remove the spread for cleaning. I see that you’ve stained your skirt and blouse as well. Let’s get those off too… Step into the shower. Nice and warm.”

“What the…”

“Do you remember why you’re here, Sherry?”

“Surrounded by an intentionally confusing layout, I’ve lost track of my original intentions… Vicki.”