lions stalk, beavers build
animals don’t have hobbies
post layoff, i do

for Ragtag Daily Prompt

the raid

The open sky stretched from sand to horizon and the riders advanced on the oasis.

“pops, i have to use the bathroom.”
“we’re almost there. once we’ve pillaged the place, you can use their restroom.”
“i can’t wait. i’ll stop here and go behind a sand dune.”
“son, this is your first raid. man up. you can hold it. we’ll kill everyone quick. you’ll see.”
“i can’t swing my scimitar like this. i’ll have an accident. their last sight will be the stains on my black robe.”
“can you do your business on your mount? while we ride along?”
“eww, are you kidding?”
“all right, go. but if we’re done before you get there, you won’t get one of the girls we spare.”
“will i still get a boy, to be my slave?”

for First Line Friday


“ok, everybody stop and listen up!”
“whew, thank goodness. i was about to toss my cookies.”
“i was going to toss my lunch.”
“i was going to…”
“ok, pipe down! we’ve got to pick a squad captain. anybody interested in the job?”
“i’ll toss my hat in the ring.”
“i’ve got a couple of names i’d like to toss off. guys who aren’t here.
“ok, name ’em. we’ll toss them around.”
“hey, wait a minute! are you ignoring me? i’m standing right here.”
“ok, we’re not tossing you out, but we’re also not tossing off all the others. what does everybody think?”
“it’s a toss up. they’re all the same.”
“not worth tossing ideas back and forth. just pick one.”
“except this clown here who should toss in the sponge.”
“yeah. toss in the towel.”
“you can’t just toss me aside! toss me a bone here!”
“ok. we’ll toss for it. heads you stay in the running, tails you don’t. i don’t really give a toss … and … you’re out … and you’ve got k.p., so head back to the cafeteria and start tossing the salads..”

for Stream of Consciousness Saturday