I’m Back.

Just returned from Nameria on the Dark Continent. Thanks, Danny, for minding my blog.

My trip went smoothly. There was a coup but that isn’t unusual in Nameria. The businessman is treated with respect by both sides. Money is money.

The hotel has a new chef, a German woman. She works in Schnitzel vom Schwein. Wild pig is plentiful in Nameria.

I looked up Adebowale. He is in fine fettle. The Namerians are wonderfully modern where homosexuality is concerned. Once my business was concluded in the capitol, we paddled a dugout up the Okatawanga to his (all male!) village. The dugout and his village required much more of my energy than my transactions with the government did. Whew.

The country is warmer than before. The Bolanga plateau has become a desert. Who know whence the animals fled, if they have survived at all.

Favored bloggers, you’ll be receiving my postcards with their rare Namerian stamps afixed to them. Be patient, for they must come out of the country by elephant, just as I did.

Two Photons Entangled While at Opposite Ends of the Universe

Two photons in the colorless part of the spectrum have been entangled for 14 billion years, scientists say.

The photons headed off in opposite directions that long ago, taking a break from each other, and thus are now 14 billion light years apart.

Scientists say that nevertheless, they are still a thing.

The photon at this end is “just sitting there,” researchers say.

“Just waiting, I guess,” Dr. Paul told me.

I asked about the other photon.

“I worry about black holes,” Paul said. “There are a lot more of them out that way. Also a lot more colored photons around.”

I asked if a photon could become entangled with more than one photon at a time.

“I’m a Christian,” Paul said. “I don’t think the Creator would make a world like that. However, the straying photon might interact with a distant photon, just a physical interaction you know, and perhaps even be annihilated, producing  smaller hybrid or mongrel particles. Science hasn’t found Hell yet, but the dead photon could end up there.”

I asked Dr. Paul if a collection of particles, like a human being, could become entangled with another human being in the same way.

“I’d be happy if she’d just go visit her mother once in a while,” Dr. Paul said, “and take the kids with her.”

Memo Released to Public

I am releasing this memo to the Congressional Grammar School in Washington, D.C. because it shows that my daughter, Sue, favors my husband over me. She should be ashamed. Let the teachers and students at CGS make their feelings known to her! As for my boys, Bob and Fred, they’re ok but they could show a little backbone once in a while.

Memo

From: Sue

To: Bob and Fred

Security: Classified!

Mom is a real jerk! A boob! I like Dad a lot more.

Dad lets us do what we want, as long as we make a few bucks and don’t bug him for $$. We can litter, he don’t care. A little weed. Whatever. Let him watch TV and play golf and that’s all he needs.

Mom cares more about the poor kids next door than she does about us. She’s always out demonstrating or “organizing.” And she’s low energy. Why doesn’t she organize Dad’s sock drawer if she cares so much?

I know you guys are “older and wiser” but jeez, I’m five years old. I got my rights!

Pi’s Message

The value of pi has now been calculated out to a couple craxillion digits or more (The First One Million Digits of Pi). Supercomputers churn away 24×7, pushing farther and farther into the innards of the number on a voyage to infinity. And beyond. Shoutout to Buzz.

Various algorithms have been designed which, when applied to the string of pi digits, convert the numbers into the letters of any alphabet. The strings of letters can be scanned for words in any language. Since the string of numbers is infinite and in some sense random, we can conceive of pi as a room full of monkeys at their typewriters.

For example, 3.14159265359 has been shown, using one algorithm, to be “Watson, come he…”

Professor R. Squared at UNLV has discovered, way out there, the King James Version of the Bible, up to halfway through Lamentations, where the word “poo” is suddenly encountered.

This led to a rush of searches for other sacred texts, complete ones, the discovery of which could be taken as a sign from God, or the gods. However, the first complete text of a book, fact or fiction, to be found, turned out to be “The Bourne Identity” (Robert Ludlum).

In my own modest search efforts, I’ve found a recipe for clam chowder that I rather like.