open letter to “madison from altoona”

hi, madison.

i have deleted your comments on this site, as i’m not too sure about the nature or extent of the obscenity laws here in alabama. i do know that it is not unusual for folks driving a toyota prius to be pulled over on county roads in the piney woods in the dead of night, even though the vehicle is to be manufactured in this very state (!). so leaving a digital trail of anything even vaguely suggesting an interest in miscegenation could lead to a possibly fatal encounter sometime with the local constabulary.

privacy! i am bedeviled by my difficulty in obtaining and maintaining it. i send out my wardrobe on a daily basis to be laundered.

having said all that, thanks for the selfies. smartphones have so much memory these days. who could guess that they might hold a thousand pictures of one person. i truly feel that i know you, inside and out, if we go ahead and count your glottis.

i’ve measured the distance between altoona and goats corner and i propose that we meet halfway between, in the speedway convenience store, 513 s. mayo trail, paintsville, ky. it’s open 24/7  and its sanitary facilities are said to be spotless.

with love, your thurston.