Shepherds – Like Brokeback Mountain, except that three wise men, three kings, and an angel go by, and there’s a wicked beautiful star in the sky.
Christmas Season – The first tree went off the lot here on November 18, but the first Santa wasn’t arrested for you-know-what until December 16th. My shopping started and finished Dec. 24th. Whew.
Gingerbread Man – He’s a cookie. He’s not animate. He can’t run. You eat him. I’m sorry.
Deck the Halls – (Has nothing to do with gambling or hallways.) These days, you might put up a little green and red crepe in the gym, along with some of those white paper wedding bells, pretending that they’re Christmas bells.
Oh Little Town of Bethlehem – That’s right. Rub it in. Where Jesus was born. Tiny even back in 0 A.D. when there were only about 100 people in the whole country.
Snow Globe – Globe with snow in it. Shake it and the snow drifts down on a little house or whatever. In the movies, the female star broods over it and sometimes it gets bounced off somebody’s head.