Best Dog Movies

First, the rules for building my dog-movie list:

– No robots, as in Sleeper (1973), or CGI dogs.

– No Lassies. A bunch of boy dogs play the girl dog, with fur hanging down so you can’t tell. Doesn’t seem Christian.

– No Jewish boy dogs, because of the circumcision thing.

– No German Shepherds, because I don’t approve of their shepherding methods, especially with Jewish sheep.

– No Chinese running dogs.

– No Muslim sons of dogs.

– No dogs dying of old age. I know that they’re doing seven years of aging for every year onscreen and if you had a movie about mayflies, say, most of the flies would die of old age in the first reel, but  you never see an old tortoise dying at the end of a movie. Let’s be fair!

– No Frankenweenies.

– No dogs playing poker.

5. Hondo (1953) – The poor mutt has to keep up with a horse for most of the movie. Course, the horse has to lug around John Wayne’s carcass, so maybe it’s a wash.

4. Goodbye, My Lady (1956) – I forget the plot but I don’t like the sound of that title. I include the movie because it was shot down the street from my house, and we used to walk over and watch.

3. Groundhog Day (1993) – I’m actually a cat person. It’s true, isn’t it, that dogs and groundhogs have a lot in common?

2. The Incredible Journey (1963)/ Homeward Bound (1993) – The cat is the smart one.

1. 7 Plus Seven (1970) – Are you familiar with the Up! series? I hope so, because I consider it, in the totality of its entries, to be the greatest of documentaries. In this one, Tony works at a dog-racing park.

Honorable mention: Shiloh (1996), because beagals are jake with me. Because of Winn-Dixie (2005), out of respect for the supermarket chain.