Greening the Earth

Amos and I sat at The Bar on Sunset drinking Ice Bombs. The atmosphere was lugubrious, if it’s possible to have an atmosphere with only two souls left alive in Hollywood. “Explain to me again how a superior galactic government could order the death of almost seven billion humans,” I said. Amos shrugged. “It happens,” [...]

Trust

Peter woke with sun in his eyes. A bird sang. He stretched and sat up. A breeze stirred the branches around him. The air was warm and the leaves a deep green. Peter swung his legs over the edge of the platform he had built high in the tree and sat there listening to the [...]

Warriors

My dad was a software engineer. My mom taught fourth grade. They were an easygoing pair. They laughed a lot. I rarely saw either of them get upset. They were content with our life. Not ambitious. Just content. My brother and I didn’t give them a hard time growing up. To us, they seemed like [...]

Scientists Want To Know: Are Men More Attracted to Women With Redder Genitalia?

Pretty in Pink What does the color of our genitals have to do with evolution? Scientists Want To Know. [Headline and subheads, Slate] 10 facts based on my team’s experiments and studies: 1. When the male member is bright red, in all or in part, the female is not attracted to it. Other unpopular colors: [...]

Writing Your Own Story

Welcome, Reader. Prepared to do a little work? Don’t worry, it will feel just like reading a story, not writing one. You probably think that I’m writing this, which you are reading. Well, I am, but not for long. Let me explain. I have decoded the deep ur-language of the human brain. What does this [...]

Fourth Wall

Journal Entry #1 I am beginning this journal in order to capture and preserve my thoughts, my questions, and, most importantly, my doubts. I would rather talk to someone else about these matters, but I am alone. Therefore, I must talk to myself. I’ve spent years searching for the truth. Years of meditation, of planning, [...]

First Contact

Humanity’s first contact with another intelligent life form did not occur with some species on a distant world. It came instead with a race of beings in a parallel universe just touching our own. Communication was established via computers connected to the equipment that poked a hole between their universe and our own. Binary transmissions [...]

Dragon Fluffer

I’ve made a nice living breeding dragons, but it’s tricky. A female dragon won’t mate with a male unless he kills another dragon while she watches. Artificial insemination doesn’t work because the female’s hormones aren’t right without the dragon battle. On the other hand, we can’t be letting our studs kill each other every time [...]

Setting It Right

When Tom perfected his time machine, the one thing that he knew for sure was that he was not going to journey into the past. The consequences of making even the smallest change to the past were incalculable. The past was out. He packed his best hazmat suit (approved for use in all hot environments, [...]

Getting It Right

Once I had perfected my time machine, I climbed in without delay and transported myself back ten years, to the day when I had lost Ina for good. I stepped out of the machine on the banks of the Monongahela. I hiked into Pittsburgh and arrived at the University an hour early. Got myself into [...]