Subway Buskers Corner: Holiday Hint #53

Put up a little table and next to your tip hat situate a big bowl of figgy pudding with a ladle, paper plates, and plastic spoons. You can obtain ample dried figs, in their original wrapping, from the Trader Joe’s dumpsters. Happy holidays! 50/50 Word Challenge

Busking at Zuccotti Park

Suggested donation: $1 – I show up dressed as a banker and say, “Hey, what’s going on here?” $2 – I show up dressed as a midwestern retired person wearing Tea Party buttons, and  shout, “You’re all terrorists!” $3 – I set up a table as a stockbroker, peddling tip sheets for $100 a pop. [...]

Busking 16

If you’re down around 23rd and 5th, stop on the corner and say hello, even if you’re too strapped in this double-dip economy to throw a buck or two into my hat. I will peel vegetables for you, at the following rates: Free – Your banana. $1 – A dozen smooth spuds. $2 – A [...]

Busking 15

Busking at the Transit Station. My sign: AMUSING IMPERSONATIONS $1  My mom $2  My dad $3  My uncle Louie $4  Our mailperson Celeste $5  That funny guy down the block

Busking 14

Busking at 6th and 72nd. My sign: WILL IMITATE PRESIDENTS FOR CASH $1  Buchanan – Bachelor twerp who didn’t stop the Civil War. $2  Arthur – NY Customs House grifter who slid in when war-hero Garfield got shot. $3  Cleveland – A fat guy. Grover, so you know how I’m going to handle that. $4  [...]

Busking 13

I got rousted from 7th and 62nd so I moved over to 8th and 64th. Officer O’Reilly’s beat stops at 63rd. My sign:  NAME A SONG AND I’LL PERFORM IT.  25 CENTS. Drop your money in the hat and name the song. If I don’t know the song, I’ll improvise the music and lyrics. 1. If [...]

Busking 12

You’ll find me at 7th and 62nd. My sign: I’LL SING YOUR SONG. 25 CENTS. Put your money in the hat and name your song. 1. I’ll tell you that I don’t know it. Do you know the words? 2. You tell me the words, or move on. 3. Do you know the music? 4. [...]

Busking 11

Through my friendship with Azradangle, an archdemon of the 7th circle of Hell and a pretty funny dude, I’ve been busking down in the Inferno this weekend. My offerings to the souls of the damned: $1  I give you a quick spritz, providing you with .o1 seconds of relief from your eternal suffering in the flames of [...]

Busking 10

Hello, everybody! This is my last chance to busk on the space shuttle, so I’m up here offering the following to members of the crew: $1  I make you laugh and spew your Tang into the weightless air and then I clean it up with my miniature Dustbuster. $2  I make the sound of escaping [...]

Busking 9

I’ll be busking at the pier tomorrow. $1  You can bait my hook $2  You can clean my grouper. $3  You can share my fried food from The Fish Hut at the end of the pier. $4  How many jellyfish in the tub? Come within 200 and you win a jellyfish. $5  Swim with that [...]